Welcome back to our series on getting at the root causes of overwhelm. Part 1 focused on how unrealistic expectations (on yourself) can really intensify overwhelm. Yes, sometimes it’s other people…but ultimately we only control ourselves, right? So let’s change the things that ARE within our control to at least minimize our own part in the problem!
Part 2, if you’ve been hanging around Tightrope Teaching for awhile, is going to be very familiar: Boundaries. This is one of my favorite topics to talk about because it is SO key to well…pretty much everything in life…including reducing your stress and overwhelm, and reclaiming your time and peace of mind.
I’m passionate about this topic because I lived the first 30ish years of my life not even knowing what boundaries were, and suffered the consequences of it.
But when I learned and applied boundaries to my life…G A M E C H A N G E R.
That’s why I keep encouraging and reminding you to use boundaries…because done correctly and well, they really can change your life.
So, here’s my quick list of recommendations for teacher-specific boundaries that will make a HUGE difference for you!
1. Don’t do extracurriculars your first year.
ESPECIALLY if you’re a new teacher…first year teachers have MORE than enough on their plates…DO NOT try to add coaching, drama club, marching band, class advisor, yearbook advisor, etc…or you will LITERALLY NEVER STOP WORKING (maybe you’re there already!) Just say NO to this one. You can always add it later, when you actually DO have some free time! (But even then, be judicious!)
2. Don’t bring work home. (*grace here for report card week…)
This was one that I actually did do right my first year: I did not bring any work home. (I did, however, regularly leave work about 6pm…BUT when I left work, I left work…because I did recognize that otherwise I would NEVER STOP WORKING (especially being single at the time–there was nothing else vying for my time at home, so it would have been easy to work straight through the evening). This is one boundary you MUST put in place for yourself; finding an accountability partner for this can help, too! Maybe that’s a teacher friend, your spouse, your kids (talk about mom guilt…but effective…). Or, if you need someone to be that someone, email me! 🙂
3. Keep work email OFF your personal device.
I’m honestly a little disturbed that I am meeting more and more teachers who kind of give me the side eye about this one.
In 19 years, I have NEVER (that’s right, never) had my work email connected to my personal phone. And I never will. Same with using Remind or Talking Points–I respond to messages on these apps only through the computer–my work computer…at work.
“But what if parents or students need to reach me?”
YOU ARE OFF DUTY. You are not a doctor or a surgeon. No one is going to die if you don’t respond to that message or email outside of business hours.
Again–when you leave work, LEAVE WORK.
4. Don’t grade everything.
Please: let it go!! I wasted a LOT of time learning this lesson: stacks and stacks of papers over years…when I didn’t have to. In the first few years of my career, I had an average of 24 grades in my book for every 10 week marking period. Then I “saw the light” and now I have literally HALF that much. (See the “Proof of Concept” section of this blog post for some stomach-turning, eye-opening math on that!!)
5. Protect your prep time.
We both know you don’t get enough prep time as it is, so why would you dip in to it on your own for the sake of accommodating others?
When you do this, you send the message to others and to yourself that their time is more valuable than your time.
Let me be the one to say this to you if you need to hear it: Your time is just as valuable as others’. Barring the occasional legitimate emergency or extenuating circumstance, protect this space on your calendar!
Wrapping it Up
Here’s the main thing: in teaching, no one is going to protect your boundaries except you. Parents, students, colleagues, and admin are all going to test your boundaries daily. It’s your job to hold the line; protect your peace. I promise, you will be a better teacher/friend/spouse/parent because of it! There are a thousand things that can cause you to feel overwhelmed in a day…give yourself a hand by taking a few of them off your plate.