How to make Vacation Enjoyable, not Exhausting

Summer has already begun for some of you, and for others, is so close you can taste it. How’s your calendar looking? If your summer calendar is already so packed with events that you barely have any white space on there…join the club. 

I will admit it: this post is as much for me as it is for you–this is something I’m continuously working on! My default mode for most of my life has been to treat the calendar like a game of Tetris…perfectly fit together with no empty spaces wins! 

BUT I have LEARNED that it is also a great way to burn out. It’s unsustainable, and it’s exhausting. I had to re-learn this lesson in a major way last summer, when I did SO many things during the month of July that I was completely mentally fried by August. I vowed not to let that happen again this summer–to be more intentional with my time so that I could actually enjoy it.

And in fact, right before sitting down to write this, I was looking at my summer calendar and seeing that there were only 2 possible dates a month apart available for my twins’ July birthday party; all the other time was already spoken for! So here we go: let’s jump into this one together and help keep each other accountable.

Tip #1: Prioritize White Space

I’ve written about this before, but it bears repeating! I need to keep reminding myself of last summer, when I jam-packed SO much activity into my June and July schedule that by the time August rolled around, I was completely burned out and wanted nothing more than 3 weeks of anti-social solitude to re-balance the scale before school began again. 

Extremes like this are not good. 

I’m going to recommend 5 days of white space on your calendar per month as a baseline. 

These can be spread out or consecutive, but put them in…now! Write in the white spaces: RESERVED, NO PLANS, WHITE SPACE, OFF LIMITS…whatever you want…just make it a deterrent to yourself. 

My friends and I always joke, “if it’s not on the calendar, it’s not going to happen”…so PUT that white space on the calendar! And you know what…if you know yourself well enough to know that even a deterrent message may not be strong enough to resist the temptation to schedule one little thing…why not get radical and take a sharpie to BLACK OUT the days instead? That way you literally cannot write anything on that date. This may seem extreme, but sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures, right? Only you truly know how desperate your own times are right now, and how much you personally need that white or black space. Try it! 

(P.S.: Do you feel like having someone hold you accountable to this would be helpful? Well, those folks who are signed up for my free newsletter got a sneak peek into my own real-life calendar this week, complete with blackout days marked off, and some extra insights and encouragement. I’ve got lots of other exciting things planned for the summer season for newsletter subscribers ONLY, so if you haven’t already gotten yourself on that VIP list, click here to sign up now!)

Tip #2: When something drops off the calendar, don’t immediately fill it with something else. 

I have a bad habit of doing this…maybe it’s been ingrained in me from my years spent working as a hair salon receptionist (fact of the day!). As the gatekeeper of all appointments, a crucial component of my job was filling appointment slots and maximizing the stylists’ time to fit as many clients into their day as possible. So when a cancellation happened, I immediately set about trying to fill that slot. White space on the grid meant no one was making money on appointments–so I was trained to do everything I could to keep it packed full…which just so happened to be a good match for my own personality default setting…but also reinforced that habit in my own life, to my own detriment.  

Whatever you have booked into your calendar at the moment, when a cancellation happens, WAIT at least 48 hours before deciding to fill it with something else. During that time, consider IF you want to fill it at all! And let’s add another tier of self-care here: if you do decide to fill that slot, prioritize a self-care activity in that slot. 

What brings you joy? What relaxes and recharges you? What do you WANT to do? Whether it’s taking a walk in the woods, getting a pedicure, reading that book you’ve been meaning to, going on a coffee date, or taking a nap, consider filling that space with a “want to” rather than a “have to” if you can. 

Tip #3: Try Half-Days

Who doesn’t love a half day or early release? Well, why not build some of these into your own summer? (Incidentally, if Tip #1 felt too much like a cannonball jump into the deep end and you’re nervous about that Sharpie, you can use Tip #3 as a way to ease in to the shallows instead). 

Or, there might be logistical issues preventing you from blocking off whole days, like a part-time summer job or other responsibilities. You can work around this. It looks something like, “On Tuesday we have a dentist appointment in the morning, but after that the day is clear.” Or, “I’m working my second job in the afternoon on Friday, so the morning is cleared out.”

Get your stuff done, but give yourself a half day, not filled end-to-end with responsibilities.

Final thoughts

Remember: rest and white space don’t make you lazy. They are necessary for your good physical and mental health. Trust me; once you give it a try, you will not want to go back to your hamster wheel! You have EARNED this summer vacation…make the decision to savor it as much as you can!