How to Reduce Stress and Overwhelm (Step 2): Edit your Activities

Welcome back! I hope that Part 1 of this blog series has been helpful to you so far!

Did you get a chance to write down and clarify your Value-Driven Priorities and Survival-Driven Priorities? (If not, take a few minutes to do it now with my Priority Organizer from Part 1: even if you think you have a good mental list of these things, writing them down really helps reduce mental clutter and allows you to focus and take action in a more tangible way. I’ll be here when you’re done!🙂)

Here’s something that might surprise you: Part 2 in digging yourself out from under the mountain of tasks that is overwhelming you is NOT completing the tasks! It is REDUCING the number of tasks you have in the first place…seeing what you can take OFF your plate, either partially or entirely.

So, here’s where you have some decisions to make, and where those lists from Part 1 will come in handy.

Make choices: Be honest with yourself

Take a look at your Survival-driven priorities and your Value-driven priorities. The Survival-driven priorities are most likely going to be pretty inflexible (that’s why they made the list in the first place). The Value-driven priorities, by definition of the fact that they represent your core values of the things that are most important to you in life, will likely ALSO feel non-negotiable (again, that’s why they’re on that list).

So the finesse here comes in leveling with yourself and realizing that you only have 24 hours in a day, and at least 8-10 of those are reserved for basic life function like eating and sleeping…so really, you’re working with a maximum of 12-14 hours a day…AND while you might be driven to accomplish ALL of the things, that’s probably not realistic. So you really need to get honest with yourself here: YOU ARE ONLY HUMAN!

If you try to do EVERYTHING well, you'll end up doing EVERYTHING mediocre. 

You’ve got some options and choices to make:

• You can CHOOSE from amongst your priorities to decide what stays, what goes, what gets done now, and what gets done later,
• OR you can KEEP each priority, but where possible, reduce the NUMBER of activities tied to each priority. 

Here’s an example of what I mean.

Today at work, I said “No” to two things tied to my survival priorities and value priorities. 

1: I was asked to be part of the Intervention Team at my school, which would require extra meetings, extra paperwork, extra hours, and a separate caseload of students not already in my own classes. This touches on 3 of my Value-Driven priorities: Communicate clearly and effectively with students, Communicate and collaborate effectively with co-workers, and Build relationships with students.   

2: I was asked to be part of a Curriculum-Writing Team for my district. It would be compensated, require 50 hours of extra time outside contract hours over the next 2 months, require extra meetings, deadlines, and collaboration with the team. This touches on 4 of my Value-Driven priorities: Communicate and collaborate effectively with co-workers, Design engaging activities, lessons, and curriculum for students, Always be tweaking and improving upon previous lessons, Display a contagious enthusiasm for my subject content.

…So if these two activities have clear and multiple ties to my self-defined priorities, then why would I say no? Aren’t you supposed to…prioritize your priorities (aka SAY YES)??

Here’s the “magic” formula for editing your activities. Ask yourself these questions:

In the case of my own two examples, I knew that:

#1- I have no extra time currently to dedicate to either one of those things, and

#2- saying yes to either one of them would impede upon my Value-driven priorities of doing my best work for my own classroom students and nurturing relationships through quality time spent with my family and friends.

Between the two, the relationships with my family, friends, and my own students are the MORE important priority to me, so I said “no.” 

Here’s another real-life example:

I was recently talking to someone who felt completely overwhelmed by her very, VERY busy schedule. She felt like she did nothing but work, even on nights and weekends. Not only was it wearing her out, but she was concerned it would start to impact her personal relationships as well.

The difficult part of this was that MOST of her activities were directly tied to her basic job requirements: they were survival-driven priorities that were non-negotiable. So in trying to help her edit her activities, I immediately focused on the only thing that was “extra”: an after-school club that she ran. However, she explained that the club was actually a source of joy and stress relief for her: she found deep satisfaction in seeing the positive impact the club was having on the students involved, and she really did not want to give it up.

This was a BIG value-driven priority for her! So the best choice here was to keep this activity and we brainstormed for other ways to save time and increase her efficiency instead.

Editing without Deleting

Another way to edit your schedule without using a hard “no” all the time is to consider going part-time. A few personal examples:

• I used to run an extracurricular club that met weekly. When it became too much, I changed it to bi-weekly.
• I wanted to volunteer to coach cheerleading for my daughters’ squad, but wasn’t sure I could fully commit to the schedule. So, I found a friend who is also a busy mom in the same predicament and we decided to co-coach. We split the practice and game schedule between us.
• My church has a cafe in the lobby that is staffed by volunteers. I enjoy doing it and helping at church is important to me, but every Sunday morning and Wednesday evening was too much time away from my family that I already don’t get to see much during the work week. So, I now serve in the cafe every other Wednesday night instead, and this works much better for me.

Your Turn!

Now you’ve got the first two tools you need to start taking back your time: my Priority Organizer and Activity Editor.

Take these two tools, a cappuccino, and an hour in a quiet spot. Sit down with a list of all (yes, ALL) of your current weekly activities.

See what you can ditch and what you can lessen to part time. I promise, even if it’s only 1 or 2 things that change, you will feel a big difference of that weight lifted off of you!

Meet me back here next week for Part 3 of reducing your stress and overwhelm!